The Catholic Herald reports that Archbishop Vincent Nichols has warned the British Catholic charity Marriage Care that it must stick closely to Catholic teaching, and so end its present practice of offering services to same - sex couples (and others in relationships not approved by the Vatican). However, this could bring it into conflict with the law, and exposes the ambiguities and contradictions within the Church’s own documents and statements.

The Archbishop of Westminster has warned Marriage Care that it must conform to Catholic teaching after it emerged that the charity is offering marriage preparation services to same-sex couples.

The charity, which receives money from the Catholic Church, states: “Our counselling service is open to and welcomes everybody over the age of 16, married or not, straight or not.” It also offers marriage preparation and “welcome all couples considering a committed relationship such as marriage”.

A spokesman for Archbishop Vincent Nichols, president of Marriage Care, said his role was exercised “solely on the basis that the charitable objects… are to provide relationship counselling, marriage preparation and relationship education services to ‘promote and support marriage and family life in accordance with the Church’s vision of marriage as a vocation of life and love’.”

He added: “It is the legal and fiduciary responsibility of the directors of the company to ensure that the charitable objects of Catholic Marriage Care Limited are observed and fulfilled. The provision of services in accordance with the teaching of the Catholic Church is also a requirement for Catholic Marriage Care Limited to maintain its continued use of the title Catholic within its designation and to retain the patronage of one of the Catholic Bishops of England and Wales.”

- CatholicHerald.co.uk.

It is entirely correct that “It is the legal and fiduciary responsibility of the directors of the company to ensure that the charitable objects of Catholic Marriage Care Limited are observed and fulfilled.” However, they also have an ethical responsibility to act with integrity, and in accordance with the law.

Marriage care receives the majority of its funding from the state. In terms of the law, heterosexual marriage and same - sex civil partnerships are equivalent in all but name, and discrimination between them is illegal. If the bishop really wants the charity to impose Catholic dogma in contravention of the law, he should reject the state funding that Marriage Care depends on.

It is precisely this insistence on fidelity to Vatican dogma, in preference to the needs of its clients, that has created problems for Catholic adoption agencies, which are forbidden by law to discriminate against same - sex couples in offering adoption services. We could conceivably see that story repeated, with marriage preparation and counselling.

There are problems also in reconciling this statement with authentic Catholic values and belief. Nichols has acknowledged previously that there is “value” in civil partnerships, there is a growing recognition by many bishops and Catholic theologians that we need to shift the emphasis in practice from a narrow focus on genital acts, to the quality of relationships. The Catechism, and the CDF letter on pastoral care to homosexual persons both insist that homosexuals are to be treated with respect, and sensitivity.

Sustaining loving and committed relationships for life, in the face of external stresses and inevitable personal conflicts, is always difficult - whatever the gender of the partners. These difficulties are compounded when they face prejudice and explicit condemnation from religious leaders. Instead of simplistically rejecting all marriage services to same - sex couples (and those cohabiting, or remarried after divorce), the bishops should be working together with Marriage Care to devise ways for them to offer sound and sensible relationship counselling to all - including those whose life circumstances put them outside of current church teaching.

Better still, the bishops and their close advisers should perhaps engage in some of that counselling themselves - and listen sensitively to the life experiences of real people, instead of deriving their understanding of marriage purely from moral theology manuals and rule books.

Books (Love, Marriage and Family) :

Boswell, John: Same-Sex Unions in Premodern Europe

Curoe, Carol: Are There Closets in Heaven?; A Catholic Father and Lesbian Daughter Share their Story

Farley, Margaret: Just Love: A Framework for Christian Sexual Ethics

Glaser, Chris: As My Own Soul: The Blessing of Same-Gender Marriage (Seabury Books)

Haldeman, S. “A Queer Fidelity: Reinventing Christian Marriage.” Theology and Sexuality 13.2: 137–52.

Jordan, Mark: Blessing Same-Sex Unions: The Perils of Queer Romance and the Confusions of Christian Marriage

Lopata, Mary Ellen: Fortunate Families: Catholic families with lesbian daughters and gay sons

Marshall, Paul Victor. Same Sex Unions Stories and Rites

McNaught, Brian: On Being Gay: Thoughts on Family, Faith, and Love

Stuart, Elisabeth: Just Good Friends: Towards a Lesbian and Gay Theology of Relationships

Sullivan, Andrew: Virtually Normal: An Argument About Homosexuality

Sullivan, Andrew: Love Undetectable: Notes on Friendship, Sex, and Survival

Tigert, Leanne McCall, and Maren C. Tirabassi.All Whom God Has Joined: Resources for Clergy and Same-Gender Loving Couples

Related articles

• Gay Marriage: Scottish (and other) Bishops, and the Catholic Backlash (queeringthechurch.com)
• Gay Marriage - A Useful Proposal From a French Cardinal. (queeringthechurch.com)
• Revolution in the Ranks: The Quiet Warriors (gaymystic.blogspot.com)